The New Love

Across the room she stared at me with amber eyes that spoke of a life of yearning, yearning for something more something better. Time slowed in the room as reality waned for a moment seeking to prolong the first sight. From that moment on i knew she would captivate me through days spent sitting in the sunlight at 2 a.m. where she lay in my arms and our breathing moved into sync . The sun never shines so bright as when the moon hangs high in her eyes. The air carries her words across the room as light as a feather with as much poignancy and purpose as a whisper has ever had. The bane of prince Charming’s existence lies in the eyes of a princess and her sway over his mind. Captivated i must be in action for every second spent wondering is a second wasted not knowing. My emotions; free flowing as a stream, are wrapped around her little finger spun up like a spool of thread.

Nice guys finish last.

I’ve come to a conclusion, nice guys finish last you have heard that before eh? Well okay but more likely than not every time you have heard it it’s been used in a cliché backwards meaning to show in the long term that karma pays off. FUCK KARMA. All i ever do for the girls in my life is try at every fucking turn to make them happy, even at the expense of my own self. Where has all this self sacrifice gotten me you ask? Well let’s see I’ve been cheated on 7 times and I’ve been told I’m not good enough countless more. Do you find it odd how the general gender rules are the guys as uncaring assholes and girls as the loving emotional caretakers I guess people get pissed off when these rules are broken. It’s strange how the more you devote yourself to making a person happy the less the fucking care how you feel. The way people relate to each other is a stupid thing and the more you try and figure it out the less anyone makes sense. I guess I should just be a douche, I guess I should just stop giving a shit about the people I care about and maybe they will give a shit about me for once.

Self Realization.

Free falling through your mind you find things about yourself you never knew you knew but have always known. Self realizations are comforting in small ways but everything that encompasses you has always been there and always will be. Can one thought change your entire life? One dream dictate the person that you are? It’s a fact of life that we want to change ourselves but the bane of our existence that we can’t. Ours lives and ourselves are defined by moments of crises there are few active decisions to improve ourselves and those few are short-lived. We improve ourselves because we have to and because it makes our lives easier. There are things I hate about myself and little I do to fix them staggered efforts here and there are all but helpful and the mind wanders to distant things. I hope you all out there can disagree with me and better yourselves. The sad reality being you can disagree with what i say, but you cannot shake the truth of my words.

Space Invaders.

Nobody thought it would happen like it did, like it does on TV. anyway. We actually held our own for a little while. They didn’t come with giant spider tanks or photon cannons, they had guns just like us they just shot father, hit harder and tore through our ranks like cardboard cut-outs. But there numbers.... they just kept coming eventually there just wasn’t enough of us left to fight anymore. They’ve gone now for the most part, they took what they needed (the remains of what resources we had left on the planet) and now all that remains are scouting parties looking for anything left to steal. It’s been 4 months since they first came. 4 months that’s all it took to destroy and entire race of people, humans are weak on the inside. They came without warning, no diplomacy no negotiations. They say the best defence is a good offence I guess they defended their planet well. We never even knew where it was you know there was a rumour going around that they didn’t even have a home planet, That there population was so vast they just roamed the universe looking for resources to supply there unstoppable growth. An entire civilization of planet pirates, still they must have come from somewhere and as one of the last inhabitants of this doomed orb I suppose all I can do is find out where the enders of life came from. I won’t fool you into thinking I’m some kind of hero or great warrior or anything like that, I’m just a dumb kid who got lucky. It really wasn’t that hard to survive in the months up too now the back yard bunker business has been lucrative in the way that everyone built one and barely anyone used them, all safe, all stocked full of supplies. Our race is down and our time here is at an end it is these sad facts that have prompted me to find out the answers to the questions I have and die alongside my people on my planet. There’s a mine in the town I grew up in I figure if any of them are left here that’s where they will be. As I walk these empty streets you’ll have to forgive my indifference to the decay of civilization around me, I’ve had more time with it than you and I suppose I just accept reality. The only reason I assume there are other people left here is because there’s no reason I should be the last one alive. The mine’s about an hour walk from here which makes it a good thing there are plenty of cars everywhere. I never got my licence not that it matters anymore I suppose. You realize just how pointless our rules and social constructs are when there is no reason to follow them anymore. I can see them now those alien bastards, I’m not worried though if I can see them they have seen me for miles and I’m not dead yet. As I pull up to their outpost (which is much more elaborate then I would’ve thought) 6 men come out to greet me with guns, they take aim. I throw my hands into the air and profess to them “Hold, I wish to die and I suppose at this point it’s only fitting that you be the ones to kill me, I ask you only one thing before I go I want to know who did this? Who could be so evil? And what wretched dark corner of the universe did you come from?” then men held steady but in the corner of my eye I saw someone walk towards me. He stood tall, pressed suit and a half cocked grin that ran too far up one side of his face. As he walked towards me he chuckled to himself briefly before drawing a pistol too my head “I’m sorry, didn’t we introduce ourselves? How rude, well let me be the first too say greetings, from earth”.

Joker And The Thief.

A dark night and a curious man who let out a curious sigh on a curious breeze, as the crackle of gravel under his feet gave way into the country air. The curious man went by many names but for the sake of convenience tonight we`ll call him the joker. Thin and tall the joker walked with a short gait contemplating his situation and his opportunities. he caught a shimmer of light in his up turned eyes that pulled his attention away from the stars. As he glanced to the right a small cottage, once pitch black against the ebony forest blurred into view. As a gleam of light flashed across his half cocked smile he swung his attention towards the homestead and started towards it. *Knock knock knock* the heavy brass door knocker belied the simplicity of the house a lions face stared back at him with each knock, the depth and detail in the small brass figure gave it a piercing gaze , and each time it struck the door the air reverberated through you as if too touch your soul and feel your intentions. A woman answered the door, wrinkles scribed across her face told stories of long years and hard won bittersweet victories, but her eyes pouring into him told of younger years and passionate lovers. ``yes? What can I do for you sir? It’s awfully late in the evening for strangers too come calling” “well milady I do know this and I do apologize for disturbing such a peaceful night but you see I’ve been walking for such a long time through this quiet night air” “so you’re looking for a place to rest your head are you?”. Though the woman’s words rung of concern there was no doubting the wavering scepticism in her voice, “yes indeed miss...?” “Adele, Adele Carroll” “miss Adele I would be truly in your debt and will impose nothing more than a pile of hay on the floor” “well you’ll get a spare bed, through the room this way”. The joker followed the woman through a narrow hallway and up a narrow flight of stairs, ducking in several places for low hanging ceilings he made his way to a room with a small bed. “It’s not very big but it serves in a pinch” Adele regarded the bed with an odd sense of apology; “it’s more than I need thank you” Adele nodded as she left the room and the door clicked shut. A thud broke the midnight air as the heavy brass lion crashed against the door. As Adele burst into the small room; where the joker still slept unaware of the commotion, a cool breeze swept the tears from the rivulets forming below her eyelashes. “What troubles you at this hour miss Adele?”; the jokers words sang relief too Adele’s ears, “someone has broken into the house downstairs I feared you may have run off on some incentive” “it was not i miss but I shall proceed to investigate the disturbance” The joker pulled on his gloves and ushered Adele too sit on the bed whilst he assumed his gentlemanly duty. The joker’s wary steps drew little solace as the wooden floors creaked with exclamations of all the things they’d seen. As he crept through the house it was very apparent whoever had come, had gone just as unwittingly. Adele’s curious defiance pulled her downstairs and as she looked through the house on the flicker of candle light her eyes drifted to a particular empty spot above a fireplace, a spot the once held a prized gold pocket watch, a spot that now held dust. Adele’s whimper drew the joker too the fireplace and his attention to the empty spot. “I take it something’s been stolen then?” “My husband’s pocket watch, my last memento of him”. Though his curiosity peaked the joker decided not to press for information, it was his way not to get involved in the people he depended on. He grasped Adele’s arm “ I shall give chase miss Adele, for the kindness you have shown me I will return the trinket”. As the door swung shut and he broke into stride the brass lions roar was the last Adele ever heard of the joker, perhaps she met him somewhere else, in some other place, under some other name but these questions never plagued her. The watch she loved so dearly swung in the lions mouth a gold metronome keeping time to the events of the night.

Marla

Her stench hung in the air like a stale 20 ferrying dust into your nose. The course wires protruding from her scalp hadn’t seen any liquid but sweat since just about as long as her grime covered face. Fingernails painted black with decay look the same as press-ons in the heat of the moment. Desperation flows like any red carpet dress and she looked more beautiful drenched in it than any starlet i have ever seen. She was stunning, and I couldn’t resist her. In the same way that cavemen clubbed females on the head i would do anything to have her and yet never admit the way I felt or what I did too anyone, especially myself. Fortunately for me her bed was rock bottom and there she lay, helpless, pathetic.

Ever wonder why you have dark thoughts? What’s that? You don’t? Don’t lie to me, your just as bad as the rest of them deluding yourself through sheer curtains made of painted on smiles and broken teeth. I don’t really give a damn if you wanna know I’m gonna tell you anyway. You have dark thoughts because you want to, you crave them you crave what you can’t have cause the populous says you can’t. On the surface you’re quiet and content with your life but underneath you wanna do everything you pretend makes you sick. And that’s why I’m doing this, doing her. Every time you almost die you taste life for a brief second and in that second you wished you fucked her, you wish you’d killed him and you wish you hadn’t hidden behind the mask of humanity. So what are you gonna do after this moments over? Shy away? Put your damn falsetto grin back on? Or are you gonna take her and do everything she wants you too, no i don’t think you will, your pathetic.